My Childhood in the Rearview Mirror

Sometimes, even though I try my best to suppress it, I'm a sentimental schmuck.

Today, I'm longing for a day gone by.

If I close my eyes really tight, I could almost pretend I am 8 years old again and all the world is right.

Giggles, dreams, cabbage patch kids, riding bikes around the neighborhood, and grandparents.  Because grandparents = childhood.

Those were the days, right?  Remembering back to the kid I was, sometimes wanting to dismiss the adult I've become.  Only through the grace of God, I've turned out relatively unscathed and I'm still standing on my own two feet with a faithful husband and two (oh-so!) cute kids of my own.  Life is pretty good.  And, now, I'm enjoying looking through the eyes of my children, almost like getting to relive my childhood once again.

Yesterday, we traveled to see my grandmother, who is almost 84.

Widowed for 5+ years, longing for something more.

My mom and dad (more than likely) have made a decision that an assisted living would be the best for her, so that means possibly selling "grandma's house".

I've watched her age, become forgetful, and sometimes a little grumpy:-/  But in the end, she's my grandmother and she will always be bigger than life.  Even on her worst day.

Saying goodbye to her house is the beginning of saying goodbye to an era.  The ending of a tangible chapter.  The beginning of another.  Its becoming more and more obvious that my sweet childhood will only remain in the rear view mirror as life continues to drive on.

I am beginning to fully grasp the reality that I'm an adult, even though the innocence of 8 sounds appealing.

Yet, I so desperately enjoy looking back because the love from those years sustains me and my faith to this day.  

In my mind, my grandmother always look like this......

and in my heart, she and the rest of my grandparents will always represent childhood to me. 

Just like Mimi & Pops will always represent childhood to my Layton and my Luke.  

As my tangible childhood fades in the rear view mirror, my children's childhood is coming into plain sight.

And a resounding thankfulness is ringing through my heart as my view is replaced with this....

"When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. 

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love."

1 Corinthians 13:11